The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre

It was on again last night. How could I not watch Renée Zellweger’s finest film? Truthfully, I view this as her finest film. Normally, I can’t stand the squinty eyed little rat, but she’s not so bad when she’s being chased around by a chainsaw. This is also one of Matthew McConaughey’s best. He plays […]

Hannibal

Oh GOD, this movie pissed me off so much. First off, I know it’s useless to compare a film to its literary counterpart. I know. Trust me, I know…Everyone’s first instinct is to point out the little differences and favorite parts that were cut out. It’s to be expected when you turn a 1,000 page, […]

Nutty Professor II: The Klumps

I am now stupider for having watched this. Admittedly, I laughed my ass off while I was watching The Klumps, but I felt so bad about it afterwards. Any scene with the Klumps in it was hilarious – but any scene without them was just boring – especially the ones with Buddy Love. The Buddy […]

Mission: Impossible 2

It was okay, I guess. No boobies, no blood. First off, it is a major James Bond rip-off. But all spy movies seem like James Bond rip-offs, since the James Bond movies are the ultimate in the genre. But this really seemed like one. And I do not know how intentional it was – a […]

The Rage: Carrie 2

LAME. 90 minutes of lame-ass shit was not worth the 10 minutes of cool shit in this film. Harpoon through the crotch was cool. Fireplace poker through 2 heads, in one shot, was cool. The chick from American Beauty nose diving into a car was cool. Being shot with a flare gun was almost cool. […]

Bride of Chucky

Should have been called ‘Chucky gets stoned, kills Jack Tripper, then he gets laid.’ That pretty much sums it up. A post shared by Lara (@knobbygirl) on Nov 22, 2017 at 5:50pm PST By far the best of the four Child’s Play movies. Just like the Leprechaun, Chucky has turned into a comedic figure rather […]

Leprechaun 3

Viva Las Leprechaun! This is by far the best of the Leprechaun saga. It gives new meaning to the term ‘fear and loathing in Las Vegas.’ The Leprechaun is free to walk down the streets of Las Vegas and there are so many weirdos there that no one notices him. Imagine the Leprechaun doing a […]