Pitch Black

Another Alien remake. Not that it’s such a bad thing. It’s pretty hard to avoid Alien comparisons, no matter what the Aliens look like, what the situation is, who the cast is. Pitch Black is one of the few films that I have seen lately that holds up to the Alien comparisons, even beyond them. […]

Galaxy Quest

Starring Sigourney Weaver’s boobs. Like April said, if Ebert gave it a thumbs up, then I don’t go see it. But somebody didn’t want to go see Next Friday, so we went and saw this instead. Actually, it was funny as hell. Tim Allen makes me want to wretch, but his ego fit the role […]

Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace

Jar Jar Binks must die! In the immortal words of Dante (Clerks, not the Inferno) “Jedi was nothing but a bunch of muppets…” And the same could be said about The Phantom Menace. Given, they are CG muppets, but a muppet is still a muppet. Not that I did not love Episode One, because I […]


Murder with a can of Campbell’s Tomato Soup. It is a scene that would leave Andy Warhol in fits of ecstasy. Anyway, Araki’s favorite piece of ass, James Duval stars in this day in the life tale of Dark, a boy with many problems – a noncommittal bisexual girlfriend (sexy Rachel True, also known as […]