Thor: Ragnarok

We originally saw Ragnarok months and months ago, while it was still in the theater. It was a hilarious and amazing film, so I don’t know why it took me so long to put together a review. Maybe it’s the gushing – I feel uncomfortable gushing – it’s so much more fun writing about a […]

Thor: The Dark World

I started writing this review last summer, when I originally watched Thor 2 on cable…my thoughts will be briefer, but possibly more favorable than when I originally watched it. This film was made for the ladies, right? A shirtless viking god, pining over the nerdy scientist girl, even though he has a hottie asskicker at […]

Thor

If I had been a boy, my parents would have named me Thor. True story. I once dressed as Thor for Halloween. Sexy Thor. 1995. Last year, I dressed as Flavor Flav, but I had to buy a new Viking hat, because my old one was hidden in my hoarder piles of shit. True story. […]

How to Train Your Dragon

I couldn’t get past the accents. All the adult Vikings have Scottish accents, but Hiccup sounded plain, old American? Actually, ALL the Viking kids sounded American. DreamWorks, you puzzle me. Wait a goddamned minute…shouldn’t all the Vikings have Scandinavian accents? Maybe I’m pissy because of my Scandinavian ancestry, or maybe it’s just because I like […]

The Norseman

This is quite possibly, the worst film I have ever seen in my entire life. I know I throw that statement around a lot, but this is the tops – worse than my usual triumverate of ‘worst’ films, The Flintstones, Prince of Darkness and Showgirls. Lee Majors is Thorvald, prince of the vikings. He is […]