We watch shitty movies, so you don't have to…
They really didn’t need to do a lot to make Jenna Jameson look like a zombie, did they? Jenna Jameson stars as one of the titular stripper zombies. She becomes zombified after being attacked mid-dance by an infected soldier with a weapons grade virus. Maybe weapons grade isn’t the right term – the virus was […]
For the longest time, I thought this film was about vampires. For years, the poster for The Serpent and the Rainbow hung in the window at Showtime Video and creeped the bejesus out of me. (This is Waller we’re talking about – the posters only got changed when they were stolen or someone peed on […]
It took almost a year, but I finally got around to watching the other half of Grindhouse…Death Proof. I’d watched Planet Terror almost a year ago, during my maternity leave movie marathon, but I had never gotten around to Death Proof until now. I’ll start off with Planet Terror. Rose McGowan stars as Cherry Darling, […]
Every once in a while, my husband will surprise me by DVRing horrible films for me to review. With a title like ‘Vegas Vampires,’ there’s no way he could pass this one up – it had to be total shit. In fact, it’s so shitty that I had to narrow it down to a top […]
You’d think that with a title like ‘Zombie Honeymoon,’ you’d be watching a comedy… I was expecting a comedy anyway – something over-the-top gory and squishy, like a TROMA flick. Zombies equal SQUISH, alright? There was some blood and some squish, but far less than your average zombie picture. Not so much Dead Alive or […]
Very few actors could carry almost an entire film on their shoulders, but Will Smith is definitely one of them. He’s on his own for 80-85% of the film and he owns it. If I had bothered to watch Cast Away, I could compare the two – but I think I am safe assuming that […]
Although it is generally agreed upon that either Plan 9 From Outer Space or Manos: The Hands of Fate is the worst movie ever made, every once in a while – this piece of shit is mentioned. In the future, one of the people mentioning it may be me. The problem with this film isn’t […]
It’s been so long that I had forgotten what it’s like. I actually got out of the house last weekend and got to attend the Houston Premiere of Poultrygeist at the Alamo Drafthouse! Poultrygeist is a love story, wrapped inside of a horror movie, tucked inside of a musical. That’s right, it’s a musical! The […]
You know what’s even scarier than running zombies? Thinking zombies! George Romero kicks his zombies up a notch by having them learn to think and communicate with one another. Led by “Big Daddy” – an especially angry looking gas station attendant zombie – the living dead stop staring at fireworks and mount an attack on […]
I know I’ve seen the original, but hell if I can remember much about it. Before I watched Dawn of the Dead, I assumed it was yet another one of the uninspired horror remakes that we’ve been subjected to in the last several years. I was dead wrong, this was not just another Texas Chainsaw […]