We watch shitty movies, so you don't have to…
I watched the original animated Æon Flux on MTV, but I have no idea how closely the film followed the original, because I don’t believe I ever saw a single episode while sober. Charlize Theron is too pretty to be Æon Flux. Julia Roberts is homely enough, but hardly the action star type. Angelina maybe? […]
The latest movie that my children have become addicted to…may well turn them into potheads. The Luna Ghost looks like the Graffix logo. The scene with smoke coming out of the Mystery Machine (a slow reveal shows sausage cooking), ‘Pass the Dutchie’ playing in the background. Shaggy saying that he stays away from hydroponics. Shaggy […]
Few things give me nightmares these days, but hearing Alvin the chipmunk tell someone that he’s going to eat their liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti sent chills down my spine. He even did that slurpy, tongue flicking thing. This can only mean one of two things. Either Alvin is a serial […]
Ooh ee ooh ah ah, ting tang, walla walla bing bang. That is the exact point that I stopped being okay with this film – the remake of my favorite Chipmunk song ever. Do juvenile chipmunks *really* need skanky back-up dancers? I thought that was what The Chipettes were for? Coincidentally, The Chipettes will be […]
The best thing about this film was the dopey Boy Band, Du Jour (French for “of the day”). They were unbelievably GAY – but not any more so that real Boy Bands, like NSYNC or The Backstreet Boys. I was surprised by their nasty song, ‘Backdoor Lover.’ The film was pretty funny, but not for […]