May 31, 2015

Jurassic Park made me start smoking. True story.

I clearly remember going to see Jurassic Park back in High School with my mom and sister (at the Tomball Cinema 7, no less). I ran into the vice principal’s son (who I later liaised with sadly and briefly), and he gave me a clove cigarette. That was the beginning of the end. I secreted it home in my pocket, lit incense and smoked it in my room. It was horrible, so of course, I later went to a Head Shop and bought a pack. Thanks, Steven Spielberg.

Storytime is over…since every 90s movie is getting a sequel these days, this weekend, we’re preparing the kids for Jurassic World…with a Jurassic Park marathon. I love having access to almost every movie ever made, all the time. I tried to explain Blockbuster to my kids, but they couldn’t even conceptualize it.

Mmmm…Jeff Goldblum at the height of his black leather sexiness. Ever since High School, my BFF has teased me about crushing on Jeff Goldblum. I had the last laugh…once when her teenage daughter was over, I had her watch Earth Girls are Easy with me. She gave Jeff a “Would Bang” rating. Ha HA!

I totally forgot that Samuel L. Jackson was in this – I want these motherfucking dinosaurs off this motherfucking island!

It was also really cool to watch the film after visiting Kualoa Ranch in Hawaii a few years ago. The scene with the T-Rex eating the Gallimimus was filmed there – and the dead tree they hid under was still there!

The movie is just as exciting now as it was 23 (!) years ago. It’s odd to see the antiquated computer technology compared to what would still be cutting edge genetic technology today. I was a bit worried that dinosaurs would look fake compared to today’s CGI, but they still look amazing.

I was surprised at how bored the kids were at the beginning of the movie. Today’s action-packed blockbusters have rendered them incapable of watching even 20 minutes of exposition in a film. Once the action started though, they were entranced.


Year – 1993
Rating – PG-13
Runtime – 127 minutes
Genre – Dinosaurs!
Director(s) – Steven Spielberg
Writer(s) – Michael Crichton, David Koepp
Actor(s) – Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough, Samuel L. Jackson
BOB Rating – Four BOBs
Favorite Quote – "What you call discovery, I call the rape of the natural world." - Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum)