August 6, 2001

Sublime parody of Jailhouse Rock.

Johnny Depp is Wade ‘Cry-Baby’ Walker, orphan without a cause. He falls in love with Allison, a good girl who wants to be bad. He fights for Allison and does it in song. When John Waters does a musical, he does it right. Even though all of the singing voices are dubbed, there are some great musical numbers. Cry-Baby’s pelvis puts Elvis to shame.

This is the last time we’ll get to see the fat Ricki Lake in film. Between this and Serial Mom, she lost some serious weight, like a hundred pounds. She is Pepper, Cry-Baby’s pregnant sister. She’s already got several kids, what’s a few more?

Traci Lords also makes an appearance as one of the Drape girls. This was one of the first non-porn films that she made – is it any wonder that John Waters would be one of the first to give her a chance? I actually have Traci Lords’ CD 1000 Fires, it’s not bad, just the usual derivative techno stuff, but it does have the main song from Mortal Kombat – bet, you didn’t know that was her.

Last Christmas, I sat around the dinner table with my family and do you know what we were watching as we ate our Christmas feast? You got it, we were watching Cry-Baby. Very fucking Norman Rockwell, if you ask me.


Year – 1990
Rating – PG-13
Runtime – 85 minutes
Genre – John Waters
Director(s) – John Waters
Writer(s) – John Waters
Actor(s) – Johnny Depp, Ricki Lake, Traci Lords, Amy Locane, Iggy Pop
BOB Rating – Three BOBs
Favorite Quote – "The first thing a Cry-Baby girl learns is our bosoms are our weapons." - Pepper (Ricki Lake)