I Spy

Owen Wilson is the KING of the buddy movie. It doesn’t really matter who his buddy is and although Ben Stiller is definitely best – anyone will do. Owen Wilson can be ANYONE’s buddy. He IS the buddy.

As much as I love the Butterscotch Stallion, his shtick is wearing thin. I know it comes easy to him – but does he have to be so obvious about phoning it in? Eddie Murphy has been phoning it in for years – decades even – and it still feels fresh and new. This performance feels especially fresh and new compared to the Disney crap he’s been churning out recently. Yet barely a decade into Owen’s career, I’m starting to ponder boredom with his performances. How many times can he play the same character? Who am I kidding? He’s like Nicholson – who cares if he is just playing himself – we’ll all still watch.

You know what – almost every single person involved in this flick seemed to be phoning it in. From the writers and director on down to the best boy and key grip – even the extras. Even one of my favorites – Famke Janssen – seemed to be only concerned about getting a paycheck. But you know who wasn’t? Gary Cole. Although I never would have guessed it from his start in cheesy TV movies, Gary Cole is turning into a pretty funny guy. Not only was he Lumbergh and Mike Brady, he’s also Harvey Birdman. His portrayal of Carlos, the Fabio-esque Secret Agent is the most memorable thing about this whole movie.

Malcolm McDowell may very well be inherently evil. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a film in which he wasn’t mostly evil, if not all the way evil. And you know what – his hair is even more evil than he is. Look at it – how it glistens and catches the light. Every strand frozen in place – almost as if the sheer force of his evilness is holding his hair a motionless hostage upon his head. Even so, McDowell’s hair phoned in its performance as well.

This would be a good movie to watch when you’re trying to go to sleep at night, because you won’t feel like you missed anything when you fall asleep in the middle of it.