January 10, 2011

So which one is Dinocroc and which one is Supergator?

More than a little condescendingly, my husband explained that Dinocroc is the one that walks on its hind legs. I guess I missed out on crucial monster identification plot points by not watching the original Dinocroc and Supergator movies.

So this is David Carradine’s legacy…one of his final films. I don’t know if this movie is more or less embarrassing than asphyxiating in a Bangkok hotel wearing fishnets and a wig. Carradine plays…fuck, I don’t really understand who he was…some rich guy who is somehow responsible for the Giant Reptilian Fuckery, so he hires the Cajun Crocodile Dundee to hunt them down. Carradine is pretty much the only famous face in the whole film, unless you count the guy who played Edmund on All My Children back in the 90s…trust me, he doesn’t count.

Since when are crocodiles and alligators mortal enemies? When are they even in contact with each other? Watching them fight was fun, I guess…not as fun as blowing up a sugar refinery to roast them. How did the eggs survive the blast? Were they Dinocroc or Supergator eggs? The anticipation is KILLING my husband – he said so.

The Soup must have liked Dinocroc vs. Supergator even better than Mega Piranha, because they showed every good clip multiple times. Joel & company are still using the clips in their year end special – the world’s most ass-kissing pool boy (“THAT…I do, Sir…”) has serious staying power.

So Roger Corman’s production company is responsible for the Dinocroc franchise, NOT The Asylum…but rest assured, they’re probably coming up with a copycat to be released shortly…Crocosaur vs. Alligaturtle? Globster vs. Giant Tadpole? Spermshark vs. Megapus! I can’t wait!

Year – 2010
Rating –
Runtime – minutes
Genre – SyFy Channel Cheezy Goodness
Director(s) – Rob Robertson, Jim Wynorski
Writer(s) – Jay Andrews, Mike MacLean
Actor(s) – David Carradine, Rib Hillis, James C. Burns, John Callahan, Bryan Hanna
BOB Rating – Two BOBs
Favorite Quote – "I'm telling you. It's Aliens! First they go for our animals, then they go for our women." - Roy