Undercover Brother

March 26, 2003

Back, White She-Devil!

Okay, I knew from the get go that Denise Richards was in Undercover Brother. She was on the cover of the DVD for chrissakes. And who doesn’t remember the stink she kicked up when she claimed that all the billboard advertisements were airbrushed to give her a ghetto booty? 37 minutes. It was 37 sweet minutes into the film before Mrs. Charlie Sheen was introduced as “Black Man’s Kryptonite.” Yeah, I was counting those minutes, waiting for the bitch to appear and ruin the film. Ultimately, she wasn’t that annoying. Well, she WAS annoying, but not any more than Chris Kattan.

Chris Kattan still has a job on SNL, right? What the fuck is he doing roles like this for? Mr. Feather was the stupidest idea for a villain that I have ever seen. Kattan’s talents were totally wasted on a villain better suited to Kenneth Branagh (see Wild Wild West) or Charles Rocket (see It’s Pat). Mango would have been a better villain than Mr. Feather!

Now that I’ve covered the low points of the film – the rest is funny as shit. I’m not a big Eddie Griffin fan – the only thing I can remember seeing him in was Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo – he made a fabulous man-pimp. He was pretty damn funny though. That doesn’t make me want to run out and see DysFunktional Family – but maybe I’ll check out The New Guy.

I definitely wasn’t expecting Doogie Howser to go all beserker and start doing fatalities on people. What the fuck? I guess he’s trying to break away from his TV typecasting. Fat chance. It takes more than a few fatalities to make that leap.

I saved the best for last…Dave Chappelle. Goddamn, he was the funniest thing about the whole film. I would be completely happy if I could just watch all of the scenes with Conspiracy Brother again and forget the rest of the film. He’s been making me laugh my ass off since Robin Hood: Men in Tights and he shows no signs of getting stale. Screwed sucked ass – but it was still watchable due to the amazing talents of Mr. Dave Chappelle. Shit! It’s Wednesday night! Okay, this review is over – I’m going to the living room to watch Chappelle’s Show.