July 11, 2006
July 11, 2006
The stars could have used Voodoo for Dummies.
The movie started off right with a Voodoo showdown in Haiti, then shifting to New Orleans, the Voodoo capital of America. But less than halfway through the film, the action shifted to Tennessee. Tennessee? Tennessee is all about country music – not Voodoo…unless of course, Daniel the Voodoo demon intended to harness the power of country music to enslave innocents and send them to hell? Because country music could TOTALLY do that! No joke, country music is not something to fuck around with.
I’m nowhere near a Voodoo Aficionado, but I’m pretty sure the person who wrote this movie wasn’t either. There was some bone throwing at the beginning and some zombies, but they were more like brain-eating Return of the Living Dead zombies, as opposed to Voodoo zombies. There were some flayed farmers – no skin at all – which was maybe kind of Voodoo? Isn’t that more Hellraiser territory? Besides, the word “Voodoo” was never even uttered throughout the whole film. So maybe the title was just added as a selling point?
I guess Eric Mabius got to keep his costume from that Crow sequel he was in – because he was totally rockin’ the Crow look in this movie, everything except the make-up. Maybe that was how he got the job – offering to bring his own costume, including a single white contacts lens? Because he certainly didn’t get it based on talent. What happened to him…he was so good in Welcome to the Dollhouse, but he turned into a total scenery chewing cheeseball.
Since ditching Angel, Charisma Carpenter has been churning out Cable TV movies, with a concentration in Lifetime and Sci Fi. I would have figured her for straight to DVD or Skinemax softcore – she’s moving up in the world. I need to check out her Lifetime movie, The Cheaters’ Club. Any movie about a nymphomaniac psychiatrist who forces her patients to have adulterous affairs has got to be good, right?
Oh yeah – Jeffrey Combs is in it – that’s one whole BOB right there. And this time, HE plays the zombie.
This is actually not half bad for a Sci Fi Channel movie. It could have used some T&A though.
Rating – TV-14
Runtime – 89 minutes
Genre – Sci Fi Channel Schlock
Writer(s) – Kevin VanHook
Actor(s) – Eric Mabius, Charisma Carpenter, Rik Young, Jeffrey Combs, Dee Wallace-Stone
BOB Rating –
Favorite Quote – "I just remember him standing there all bad-ass in his black outfit, cussing out the devil in Latin." - Lola (Jayne Heitmeyer)